No body is perfect: Eating disorders often ‘bio-psycho-social’ illnessess

Branson went through phases of anorexia and bulimia from ages 14 to 19.

“[Anorexia and bulimia] are more about the inner struggle of feeling like you have control more than what people think about how you look,” Branson said, adding that she would sometimes go days without eating. “I’d give myself one thing that I could eat. … And then you get hungry and you go on your binges, and you eat a lot; then you feel guilty after you eat it, so you throw it up. And then you think, ‘I don’t want to throw up anymore,’ so I’m just not going to eat. That was my only way of feeling like I had some sort of control – the control over my body.”

Because of her eating disorder, Branson said she didn’t begin menstruating until she was 19, which, Walker said, is a significant sign in understanding the severity of the illness.

Ironically, it was Branson’s modeling career that forced her to finally get healthy, she said.

“When I got into modeling I actually did a turnaround,” she said, adding that as a swimwear and lingerie model, she needed to look healthier and [curvier]. “Instead of being obsessed with being skinny, I am obsessed about being healthy.”

Though Branson is now a doting mother of four, she said she experienced infertility problems because of hereditary issues that were exacerbated by having had an eating disorder earlier in life. To get pregnant she had to have surgery, but once she gave birth to her twin boys, she said “everything kicked into gear,” and her third and fourth children were born naturally after that.

Buhot – a child therapist and member of the Naperville-based National Association of Anorexia Nervosa Associated Disorders – said her three-year battle with anorexia began as a diet, and gradually morphed into a yearning for physical perfection.

“The pressure was all internal … I was competing against myself. Every day I wanted to be better than the day before,” she said.

Buhot started dieting in college – at age 18 – in preparation for a spring break trip to Panama City Beach.

“It was a way to get control, and once it started, I felt like it was something I was good at, and it kind of became my identity,” she said.

When Buhot’s father visited her at school in October of her sophomore year of college, there was a staggering difference in her weight from when she left home in August.

“It was enough for him to be like, ‘I’m pulling you out of school,’” she said, adding that if her father had not interfered, the problem would have gotten progressively worse.

Buhot and her family sought treatment and received counseling for anorexia.

“It took them a lot of family therapy to understand that I wasn’t just choosing to do this,” Buhot said of the recovery experience. “To this day, if I lose a few pounds, my family goes into panic mode, because it takes them back to that time.”

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Style File: Simona Zappas

The Mac Weekly sat down with Simona Zappas to discuss fashion, teen phases and lint rollers.

TMW: How would you characterize your style?

SZ: Like a baby trying to dress up like an adult. A baby’s businesswoman.

TMW: What inspires your fashion?

SZ: I guess stuff that I watch. I love the clothes in Pee-Wee’s Playhouse, Miami Vice and Miranda Hobbes from Sex and the City.

TMW: Have you always been interested in fashion?

SZ: I’ve been obsessed with it my whole life. It reveals how extremely shallow I am.

TMW: How has your style has changed over the years?

SZ: I go through such phases. I practice serial monogamy with them. Ever since I was eight I can think of overarching themes and their beginnings and ends.

TMW: What are some examples of themes?

SZ: For a while in high school I tried to dress like a natural history museum. I wore dead animals. Then I transitioned to a baroque painting. When I came to Mac, it was the height of my intense riot girl phase (every trend of the 90’s). I only recently got rid of all of those clothes.

TMW: What phase are you in now?

SZ: It’s hard because of the weather. I’m limited to dressing specifically a lot of the time. In my dream world, I’d look like a businesswoman everyday. I love business.

TMW: What motivates these phases?

SZ: Sheer ego, it’s all for me.

TMW: What does your family think of your style?

SZ: My parents think I dress like an old lady, they think I look ridiculous. My entire extended family was over and it took me an hour to leave because everyone saying “you look horrible,” “you look so stupid,” finally I said “that’s it, I’m leaving.”

TMW: How much time do you spend choosing an outfit each morning?

SZ: It depends, I’d 20-45 minutes. I have those “I don’t have anything to wear” moments all the time. I have simple throw-on outfits. I call them cartoon character outfits because cartoons have one thing they always wear.

TMW: How big is your closet?

SZ: In the past year I’ve gotten rid of over half my clothes, it drives me crazy because I miss a lot of things. I’m a pretty excessive person.

TMW: Where do you get your clothes?

SZ: My grandma gives me a lot of cool clothes. I also really like thrift stores and flea markets.

TMW: What’s your ideal outfit for a Minnesota winter day?

SZ: I hate my winter clothes. I would say most days I’m wearing some sort of all black ensemble and then a big jacket over it. It’s secretly cozy.

TMW: What would you wear for a night out or a special occasion?

SZ: Probably the same thing. I love the process of getting
dressed. I like to do it with friends but it’s more of the process. I generally end up wearing the same things. I love the
transformation, I wake up looking like a piece of white bread.

TMW: What are your favorite pieces?

SZ: A red Angora baseball cap, a pair of lavender John Fluevog platforms, a jean jacket with a patch of Meatwad form Aqua Teen Hunger Force, and a yellow and black polka dot blazer that my best friend gave me. I also love to lounge in my robe and feel languid.

TMW: Have you ever wanted a career in fashion?

SZ: In middle school wanted to be a lingerie designer. I made bras that looked like bacon and eggs. That’s it really. I’m a Media and Cultural Studies Major.

TMW: In ten years, what do you predict your style will be like?

SZ: I think that as I’ve gotten older and gotten jobs my style has really changed. I couldn’t wear half the things I used to wear because you could just see my butt. I also hope I wear more hats. I would love a hat with fruit on it.

TMW: What’s the craziest thing you’ve ever worn?

SZ: I had this pair of ripped jeans that just literally didn’t have a butt. I wore them all the time not thinking about that. My friend showed me this old picture, she said “look at this” and I was like “oops!”

TMW: Do you have any style advice for the masses?

SZ: Buy a lint roller, it will change your life. It’s that subtle flourish.

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